Is it possible that you had buried unmet needs, hurt feelings, unexpressed expectations in a sea of neglect. Could it be possible that you neglected your sacred role as communicator with your spouse? Could you have taken it for granted that he or she knew or could read your mind, understanding exactly what would bring you pleasure or pain? This neglect could have created a wedge or barrier between you and your spouse.
Define your Sexual Experience Yourself!
Make some plans together. Plan to talk about your sex life regularly. See it as a natural, functional part of your relationship. It is easy to take this act of marriage for granted and end up with a sexless or even unfulfilled sexual relationship. Life is too short. Enjoy the ride of intimacy. Be willing to be a part of the process of defining what it looks, tastes, and feels like in your marriage!